![]() I do not, though wish for these “clean” empty spaces. I do feel the need to “declutter” not to wade in things and mainly “The more of less” gave me an emotional input much needed in this process where mainly practical guides had not. ![]() It’s a mish-mash of old and new, necessary and superfluos, cherished things and those noone likes nor uses. Magazines sport photos of beige empty apartments without a bookshelf in sight, describing it as “clean surfaces”. Being car-free is not a problem, venerating car possession is more of a working class phenomenon here, many middle class professionals are more prone to use their bicycle or to make excuses for their percieved need of a car, living in the city. Minimalism, or at least the outer signs of it in one’s home is rather highly hold among a lot of people I know. In another surrounding I might have just that problem of feeling to be unable to keep up materially with the “Joneses” (or rather the Svenssons and Johanssons :-) ) But in fact I face somewhat of the opposite stress. A person on welfare here (Sweden) lives a life materially superior to the middle class in many countries but does not compare themselves with them and will often find themselves poor and unhappy. My children might find my upbringing without a sole computer or cellphone at home poor, but those being rare in the seventies-eighties nor I nor my friends ever did. We do not without afterthought relate to persons in a much different situation. “Our peers” being the key choice of word. Our upbringing and our present surrounding will therefore make most of us adjust to the values, ethics, moral code, religion or lack thereof, speech patterns, clothing, taste of our peers, and of course to relate our possessions to those the possess, our we think they do. A sole human among our forefathers had no chance to survive, much less to procreate and groupthink has been inherited in us as a winning surviving concept, exclusion from the group meaning death. Our tendency to relate to our surroundings, however, is embedded in our nature as humans and not that easy to separate from, nor is it necessarily a bad thing. ![]() The advice not to be drawn away from our own goals by trying to follow other’s consumerism is certainly sound advice, and surely relevant for a lot of people. You certainly won’t get there trying to live the Joneses’ life. ![]() Pursue those things that bring you fulfillment and significance and meaning. But when we are doing the best we can with the resources we have, it results in the confidence and peace that the Joneses have probably been chasing all along. When our resources are spent on pursuits that bring us fulfillment, we find fulfillment. When our time and money are spent on things we consider important, we find an inner peace and calm that allows us to experience sufficiency, regardless of how much others have (or how they spend it). When we take control of our life and begin pursuing the life we want to live, we discover the best way to overcome envy and jealousy of others is to live a life consistent with our values. Or would we much prefer our own life and our own choices? Wouldn’t we much prefer to pursue our own values? Because almost certainly your values are different than the Joneses! We want what they have, or buy what others are talking about, or click-to-ship the same product everyone else is buying on Black Friday.īut one of the rarely mentioned side effects of conforming to the life that others are living (what we buy, how we spend our time, and what we desire to have) is the complete and total loss of individuality.īut deep down, do we even want those things? Do we even want to change our clothing styles? Or buy the new car… or boat… or bigger house in the gated community? “Keeping up with the Joneses” is, by its very nature, a pursuit of conformity. We conform to modern styles of furniture, countertops, decorations, and even appliances. We watch the same shows and movies and read the same books. Think of the changing styles and how quickly the masses adopt them. It is, almost certainly, different than the life the Joneses are living. Rather than trying to “keep up with the Joneses,” try to “keep up with the person you want to be.”
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